Breaking Down the Ten Most Expensive Movies of All Time
I recently came across a list of the the ten most expensive movies in the history of cinema. The list is not adjusted for inflation according to the author. Click on the link to go to Linkphobia’s ten most expensive movies and see the list in greater detail and in sequential order. I started out with the intention of just commenting on a few of the movies, but I ended up discussing them all.
Titanic was one of the highest grossing movies of all time and seems like a bargain at only the tenth most expensive movies of all time. Even though it was somewhat cheesy you can understand why they spent the money to make this movie and director James Cameron is a master of directing big budget movies with loads of special effects. It looks amazing so the money was well spent.
Other than that one much of this list includes some really bad or mediocre movies. Many of them did score big at the box office so you can certainly understand why the studios were happy with most of these movies. Although it quickly becomes clear that there is a theme here. The third movie of a trilogy is usually the most expensive and the worst of the series. Inflation may explain why it is the most expensive. The reason for why it is the worst of the trilogy are threefold.
Sometimes as in the case of Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines, which checks in at number nine on the list, it was made many years after the original movies and did not have the original director. It was really bad and you have to guess that if James Cameron was involved years later it probably would still have been the weakest of the three films, but likely significantly better than this version.
The only logical explanation I can come up with for Spiderman 3 is that director Sam Raimi and actors Toby Maguire and Kirsten Dunst purposely tried to make a horrible movie in hopes that it would flop and they would not be forced to continue making Spiderman movies. Of course I do not know whether they have a contract to make more of these movies or not and the movie made much more than they spent on it so it is likely there will be more in this franchise although hopefully they will be closer to the first two than this horrible movie. Spiderman 3 was the second most expensive film.
Pirates of the Carribean: At World’s End was the most expensive of the three pirate films and also the most expensive movie of all time. It looks good. It still has Johnny Depp as Captain Jack Sparrow and the attractive Keira Knightley as Elizabeth Swann, but something seems to be missing. It is still somewhat enjoyable and far better than many of the other movies on this list including the other two movies from the trilogy series, but was also the worst of the trilogy and not nearly as enjoyable as the original. It does seem that Ms. Knightley exclusively plays in movies that require her to wear a corset and a push up bra. Obviously she is not the most buxom actress in Hollywood, yes that is being kind, but I really do wish she would occasionally make movies other than those period piece dramas. She is a good actress and even though she is lacking some physical attributes that some other actresses have acquired artificially she is naturally beautiful. Unfortunately she is usually in movies I have no interest in seeing with the exception of the Pirates of the Carribean movies. Another movie that is part of a trilogy, and is also on this list at number five, is X-men: The Last Stand. The first two X-Men movies were decent, but the series runs out of steam by the third film. I was not as big of a fan of this series as the Pirates or Spiderman series so it was not as disappointing as those third movies were to me at least.
A quick run down of the other films on the list. King Kong was actually not bad, it is sixth on the list and may be the best movie on this list in my humble opinion. I still cannot figure out why Jack Black was in this movie. It was good, but had the potential to be great. It also was about an hour too long. The fact that I am calling this the best movie on the list says more about the quality of the list than the quality of this film, but still Kong and Naomi Watts make the movie worth seeing despite some of its flaws.
Now to the third film on the list. I have not seen Quantum of Solace, but have heard from many that it is the worst Bond movie along with being the most expensive. Look the Bond films are enjoyable, but sometimes people overrate just how good they actually are based on nostalgia. Many of the plots and characters are laughable both intentionally and I suspect unintentionally. It is meant to be an enjoyable series of movies that should not be taken too seriously, but of course many fan boys take this sort of thing very seriously. The movies have beautiful women with ridiculous names, fancy cars and gadgets, but they are not known for having realistic plot lines or anything resembling a good script. I will watch this film without any of the emotional attachment that some fans have and if Bond is a three dimensional character with emotions that will not cause me to go into hysterics or to comment incessantly on movie sites about how they are killing James Bond. If you feel differently and are offended that I am not more attached or full of despair about them turning James Bond into a softy feel free to comment. I have not seen the movie though so I do not know for sure how to feel about it yet.
I have also not seen the eighth film on the list the Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian, but I really was not crazy about the first film. It seemed that the studio was hoping for similar success to other adventure fantasy films such as Harry Potter and Lord of the Rings. It is more suited for younger audiences than those other films. I know Harry Potter is also, but I find them well made enough to be enjoyable for viewers of all ages. The first movie looked good, but was fairly boring. Apparently the rights to the third film in the series have not been picked up. It is not surprising as according to the figures on this list it did not fare as well financially as some of the other big budget films although it did at least make some profit.
Pirates of the Carribean: Dead Man’s Chest , the second Pirates film and the fourth on the list, was better than the the third film, but not nearly as good as the first film. Maybe expectations have something to do with it as after the first film expectations were raised enormously. When the first film was released even though I was intrigued by Johnny Depp’s Captain Jack based on the buzz surrounding it I do not think anyone anticipated a movie based on a children’s theme park ride being that well done. Of course if you replaced Depp with anyone else it probably would have been forgettable although the movies were all great visually so they likely would have still been watchable.
I saved the most disappointing movie on this list for last. It was number seven on the list, but the amount of money spent had little to do with why this film failed to live up to expectations. It was made by the same director who made the first two X-Men movies which were decent so there was no reason to expect the movie to be this bad, but Superman Returns was one of the most disappointing theater experiences I have ever had. Everyone who went with me to the theater and everyone I have spoken with since agreed with me. Superman was always the most popular superhero and it is shocking that with so many other good or great comic book adaptations coming to the screen in recent years that this Superman Return was so bad. It was extremely boring. Even Kevin Spacey was not good as Lex Luther. I have nothing good to say about this movie. I think it was not even as good as Spiderman 3. I am going to summon Charles Barkley’s spirit for this next observation.
Charles: That movie was terrible. Superman should have never returned. He should have stayed wherever the hell he has been all these years. Christopher Reeve is rolling over in his grave. No that was not a joke about Christopher Reeve being handicapped you knucklehead. At least he is dead Ernie you always complain when I say Larry Bird or someone else who is still alive is rolling over in his grave now you complain that I said a handicapped guy rolled over in his grave. He’s dead Ernie he can’t really roll over in his grave handicapped or not. I need a drink. Kenny how much you want to bet that they make another Superman movie? I bet Christopher Reeve returns from the dead and stops production on the film if it is made by and cast with the same people. Yeah I’m serious I will bet two hundred grand on him returning from the grave to halt production on Superman 2. No I do not need help. I like to gamble nothing wrong with that.
Full disclosure: Obviously since there was no adjustment for inflation all of these movies were made recently. This is of course no excuse as to why almost all of them were mediocre or worse. Also I am a huge fan of Charles Barkley he is one of the funnier personalities on television and hopefully he will be for years to come. He is one of the few on air sports personalities who says whatever he is thinking regardless of the consequences or whether it has anything to do with the topic at hand, which is usually basketball related. I have added links to imdb.com for any movie, actor or director listed in any of my posts going forward starting with this one. Just click on the actor or director’s name or the title of the film and you will be transported to the wonderful world of imdb, which is a wonderful resource which I use frequently. Please let me know how you like this new feature.
The most surprising thing about this list to me is that the Dark Knight was not on it. Christopher Nolan should have received an Academy Award nomination for best director. Since I have not seen most of the other movies I really cannot say for certain whether it deserves a nomination for best picture, but I find it hard to believe that there were five better directed movies than the Dark Knight. He made a movie that was superior to all of the movies on this list for less money. Yes I know that Titanic won best picture. I think it probably should have won best director, but maybe not best picture. There have been other films that I either did not want to see or was not really that crazy about which have either been nominated or won Academy Awards so I do not get that worked up about it. It is sort of like baseball fans getting irate over who does or does not make the Hall of Fame. If a movie that I like wins I am glad if not it does not it does not upset me. The same goes with the Baseball Hall of Fame. If someone gets elected who I like I am happy, but I do not get too upset if someone gets in who does not deserve it. Life is too short to get upset about trivial matters. That said here is a trivia question for you.
Who won the Academy Award for Best Picture in 1994?
a) Forrest Gump
b) Pulp Fiction
d) Quiz Show
e) Ernest Goes to Jail (Just kidding the other nominee was Four Weddings and a Funeral)
I’m sure you could Google the results, but if you do not remember which one won instead of Googling it just think which one you think should have won. There is no prize for the right answer. That year always sticks out in my mind because I absolutely loved two of them, really enjoyed another, thought one was pretty good and did not see the last one. Some years it ends up being a movie I did not like, but in this particular year it was one that I really enjoyed.
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